When attending a Hawaiian funeral, it’s important to understand local customs and the significance of traditional elements like the lei. Hawaiian funerals are often a blend of modern and traditional practices, reflecting the rich culture of the islands. This guide will help you navigate funeral etiquette, attire, and the unique role that leis play in the ceremony.
Unlike the more somber tone of Christian funerals, Hawaiian funerals are often centered around celebrating the life of the deceased. While grief is expressed, it is common to see attendees singing, dancing, and sharing lighthearted stories about the person who has passed away. This approach brings warmth to the gathering, honoring the memory of the deceased through joy and shared remembrance.
Funeral Etiquette: Blending Tradition with Modernity
In Hawaii, funeral etiquette combines elements of both old customs and new practices. While some funerals may follow Western traditions, such as formal black attire, others embrace the vibrant Aloha spirit.
Attire: Guests should inquire with the family regarding the dress code, which can range from formal attire to casual Aloha wear. The latter often includes colorful Hawaiian shirts or floral dresses, reflecting the vibrant culture of the islands.
Courtesy: As a guest, respect for the family’s wishes and cultural norms is essential. Always check the specific type of service, so you can dress and behave appropriately.
Understanding Funeral Leis: A Symbol of Love and Respect
Leis are an integral part of Hawaiian funerals, symbolizing love, respect, and the circle of life. The act of exchanging leis honors the deceased and their family, enveloping them in the spirit of Aloha—both in hello and in a final goodbye.
Wearing a Lei: Wearing a lei during the service is a gesture of respect for the deceased. The lei may be worn by attendees, draped over a casket, or placed around a photo of the deceased.
The Lei-Throwing Tradition: After the funeral, leis may be left in a place that was meaningful to the deceased or tossed into the ocean as a way of honoring their memory. Some individuals remove the flowers from the lei and scatter them in the water, adding a personal touch to this symbolic gesture.
Choosing the Right Lei for a Funeral
When selecting a lei, consider the symbolic meaning behind different types of flowers and foliage. Some popular choices for funerals include:
Maile Lei: Traditionally worn during funerals, the maile lei is an open-ended lei made from a sweet-scented vine. It represents respect and is often used to drape caskets or photo frames.
Ti-Leaf Lei: Known for bringing good luck, the ti-leaf lei is another popular option, symbolizing strength and protection for both the deceased and the family.
Pikake and Orchid Leis: Fragrant and elegant, these leis signify love, friendship, and eternal connection, making them a meaningful choice for funeral services.
Hala Lei: The Hala Lei holds a special place in Hawaiian culture, particularly at funerals. Made from the bright orange fruit of the Hala tree, it symbolizes the end of a journey, making it a fitting tribute for a final goodbye. Due to agricultural restrictions, these leis can only be delivered locally within Hawaii.
Additional Considerations for Selecting a Funeral Lei
Allergies: Consider any potential allergies the recipient or other attendees may have when selecting fragrant leis.
Agricultural Restrictions: Keep in mind that certain leis, such as the Hala Lei, cannot be shipped to the mainland due to agricultural regulations.
Open Leis: Some traditions prefer open-ended leis for funerals, symbolizing the continuation of the journey rather than closure.
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Local Orders
We understand that parking in Chinatown can be difficult and that all you want to do is pick up some leis for your loved one, so let us do the work!
If you are ordering for pick up or delivery on the island of OAHU, please do not place your order online. Please call us at 808-536-6538 or come to our store so we may assist you.
If you would like to do a local curbside pick up:
1. Order over the phone or in store.
2. On the day of pick up, call us at 808-536-6538 when you are at the top of Maunakea and Beretania Streets. Inform us of your car color and model. If we do not answer the phone we may be assisting customers in the store. Please do try your call again.
3. Pull up in front of the shop, toot your horn, and we will hand your order to you. If we are already assisting a customer in store, we ask for your patience. You will be serviced as quickly as possible.
Payment: Payment can be rendered over the phone when you order, or by cash/credit card/check at time of curbside pickup. For expedited pick up we highly recommend paying in advance!
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